Saturday, August 23, 2008

Birthright... Birthrate...Boozeright... or Beautiful?

Last night I had my first major encounter with Birthright Israel. Birthright, for those who don't know, is a totally free 10-day trip to Israel whose purpose is to connect, or reconnect, young North American Jews with their Jewish identity. Its other, less obvious purpose is to get young Jewish men and young Jewish women to hook up, fall in love, get married, and have Jewish babies.

The program began in 2000, just after my parents shelled out a considerable amount of money for their sixteen-year-old daughter to spend a month in Israel with NFTY. Years later, I paid the price for this seemingly positive purchase. My status as someone who had already been on an organized trip to Israel deemed me 100% forbidden from participating in Birthright as a young adult. In the eyes of Bronfman and Steinhardt, I had already been convinced of Israel's magic, and thus, some other American twentysomething deserved to go instead.

Every day on my walk home, I pass the Prima Kings Hotel at the corner of King George and Ramban. Each day it seems there is a new Birthright bus unloading kids and luggage. A new, completely enchanted group of twentysomethings stands there, hanging all over each other, looking a bit dazed and hungover. They look up and snap pictures of their hotel and of each other in groups of three; big smiles on their faces as they connect with other Jews. It happens nearly every day, thus convincing me that Birthright has permeated the city of Jerusalem.

Last night, my friend Meredith asked Adam and me to join her in singing and playing guitar for the Birthright group her boyfriend was in. She even threw in a delicious homemade dinner prepared by her and our friend Ari. We willingly obliged, and headed over to the Montefiore Hotel around 9:30pm. We arrived to find tables of twentysomething Americans talking, laughing, and having a great Shabbos. Only upon closer inspection did I realize that everyone was drinking, and there were bottles of booze and wine everywhere.

We moved the group outside for the song session, and the booze followed. As the music began, I looked around to see some people having trouble standing up. People were kind of leaning on each other, acting progressively sillier, and singing louder and louder. While I'm sure they were having a grand ole time, I was kind of uncomfortable and somewhat grateful when my mother called midway through "Closer to Fine" to talk about her trip to Israel in October.

Now, I'm no Prohibitionist. I like to think wine is the perfect way to wash down a meal. And just the night before a group of us had a fabulous time celebrating Ari's birthday with tapas, sangria, and alcohol-fueled karaoke singing. Yet, something about this gathering of people reminded me of college. It sounded exactly like Adam's experience on his Birthright trip, and it even reminded me of when those six Canadian boys got "caught" drinking on my NFTY trip and nearly passed out from dehydration the next day at Masada. (Dudes, seriously, what were you thinking?)

I couldn't help but wonder... (in true CB style) are these people having an "amazing" experience on Birthright because they're partying the whole time? Or are they really, legitimately seeing and hearing and breathing Israel and connecting to something whole, something Jewish, and something real?

And then, something rather odd happened. A young man named Andrew came over to introduce himself to me. I immediately liked him, for I am drawn to anyone with the same name as my brother. (Or my mom, or dad, or even Chewbacca our dog... though that's less common) He started asking me questions about where I was from, and what I was doing here.
Upon explaining my purpose for being in Israel, his eyes lit up. He proceeded to confess to me that this was a wholly transformative experience for him. Andrew grew up with a Jewish mother and Christian father, they gave him the option to choose and he never really did. He had always been ambivalent about religion but curious about Judaism. He agreed to go on Birthright when his Jewish friends convinced him it was worthwhile.

Andrew informed me that, here in Israel, he had never felt so Jewish, he had never felt so connected. He could not believe how it had happened, and only after a few days. He felt that Israel welcomed him with open arms, and that this was indeed his Homeland. He wanted to return to Miami and seek out a Jewish community for himself. Best of all, he was interested in becoming a Bar Mitzvah at the age of twenty-six.

I told him that, as a future rabbi, this was music to my ears. His motivation to seek out a Jewish identity separate from his parents or his background was, inevitably, a truly wonderful result of Birthright. Booze or no booze, this young man will come away from his time in Israel with exactly the kind of philosophy Birthright wants him to have. A committment to Eretz Yisrael, and a desire to create a Jewish community for himself back home.

I can't help but hope Steinhardt and Bronfman are reading this post and grinning ear-to-ear.

Adam and I returned home soon after Andrew's confession. I thought about the whole thing on my walk home, and wondered if maybe I've been to critical of Birthright to begin with. Perhaps these people crave their Jewish community, and alcohol helps accelerate that process in the short 10 days they have here. Who am I to say that booze should not be responsible for helping people solidify their Jewish identity? And how can I possibly be so judgemental about a group of strangers with such a short time together on an organized trip abroad?

Last night I realized I need to cut Birthright a little slack. The program, for all its mishegas, can be a tremendously positive experience for people. The way in which other Jews connect with Judaism is really none of my business; each person is entitled to their own conduit through which to renew their interest in being a Jew. I think one's experience should be shaped by a truthful, realistic portrait of the country they are visiting, and not just the view from the Birthright bus window. Yet I also know my own travels abroad have painted me a certain picture of the places I have visited. I have not always been privy to the frustration and squalor that exists in every country around the world. This is the hard truth of travel.

The moral of the story? Everyone is entitled to their opinion, their experience, their feelings. I believe every Jew should come to Israel and live and breathe this country. How people get here is entirely up to them. What people do here is entirely up to them. It is my hope as a future rabbi that people connect (or don't connect) with Israel based on legitimacy and truth. It is my hope that people see as much of Israel as they can, for this country has a tremendous lot to offer the world. Finally, I hope that people do seek out all kinds of connections here. The word "connection" seems to encompass so much of what I seek, and what I hope to pursue throughout the rest of my life. Therefore, I hope others use that theme of connection and apply it to their own perception and comprehension of Judaism.

To close, I will say congratulations and Mazal Tov to Barack Obama and Joe Biden, the world's newest It Couple. May they have a long and happy life together!

-Jaclyn

4 comments:

Empty Nesters said...

I thought you were going to berate Birthright's existence and since I fervently hope your brother takes advantage of the wonderful gift Bronfman and Steinhardt have created, I was a little concerned. But the end of your blog was perceptive, honest, and full of hope for the future of the Jewish people. Thank you so much for allowing us a peak into your own journey, my darling daughter. I love you.

RobynSarah said...

So much wisdom pours out of you into these blogs! Thank you for sharing and make sure you consider sharing excerpts of these entries with your future congregation! xo Robyn

EmKap said...

Your insights are unmatchable, my dear. I so enjoy reading your entries...I feel like I'm getting a little glimpse into your world. :) It's wonderful!
Love you. Keep doing what you're doing! We're all proud of you!

Anonymous said...

Hi, Jaclyn!

It is delightful to hear your thoughts about experiencing religion. So many people believe that experiencing religion is limited to a set of practices, defined by one or two people. I personally believe that religion is about connecting with other people who hold similar world views. This can be an easier task when wine is involved, particularly for the 20-something set. :) Not everyone agrees with me, and that's what makes religion such an individual adventure.

I would be honored to call you my rabbi.